30 March 2012

Fearless Females - March 30: Words of Wisdom

I'm a day late on this one, but I really was looking forward to this one. I've just been up so sick from strep throat. I'm better just in time to do one last post to honor my female.

There is one piece of advice that was given to me by my mother that was given to her by her mother. She looked at me just before I married my husband and said, "now I'm going to give you the same piece of advice as my mother gave me......." She went on to tell me that grandma had advised her to wait two years after she was married to have children. She said the grandma told her that they would need that time to grow and know each other before they brought children into the picture. Mom said it was the best advise that grandma ever gave her.

I agreed with her and really didn't give it too much pause as we did not plan to have children right away anyway. I was only 19 and I didn't want children then. I knew I would later. But no mater my feelings I saw it as the perfect to tell my to be husband about our conversation and about how I felt about children at that time. He also completely agreed as he was headed off to the ARMY and didn't want them right away either. We didn't have kids for two years, then two and a half.......By then my mother said she was begining to wonder if she should have given me that advice and if they were ever going to have grandchildren. We found out that we were going to have our first child the same month we celebrated our three year anniversary. My parents had just moved to ID from CA a month before. When we found out we decided to stay behind and wait until after the baby was born to move to ID as well. As a result my mother wasn't there when her first was born, but she sure knew how to get on a very quick flight and be there in time to see him just after he came home. It didn't mater too much, she was just glad to be a grandma finally.

I will certainly pass on the same advice, not only to my daughter, but my boys as well. I think its important that a newly web couple take the time to know each other, grown together, learn to live together and create a strong foundation for a wonderful marriage before they bring children into the picture. They owe their children that much. They will all be happier for it.

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