52 Ancestors: Mary Ellen Hayes 1931-1993

Mary Ellen Hayes was born on September 11, 1931, in Hominy, Oklahoma, during the height of the Great Depression. The 1940 census provides a detailed glimpse into her early life, showing her family living in a multigenerational household headed by her grandmother Ellen. Her father Martin, age 33, worked as a laborer in the Oklahoma oil fields, a significant detail that helps explain both their location in Osage County (known for its oil industry) and their means of survival during the Depression. Her mother Lillie was 27, and Mary Ellen, then age 8, lived alongside her younger brothers James T. (6) and David M. (4). Also living in the home was Celestia Hayes more affectionately known as Aunt Perky.

Like many families during the Great Depression, the Hayes family adapted to economic hardship by sharing a home with extended family. Not only was Mary and her family living with her grandmother, but her Aunt Perky (as we knew her. Her name was Celestia in documents) and her cousin Jay were also living in the home. 

The family eventually left the oil fields of Oklahoma behind and relocated to Turlock, California, marking a significant transition in Mary Ellen's life. At the young age of 15, she married Von Joseph Roe in Reno, Nevada in 1947. However, whether she knew at the time or found out later I do not know, but this marriage was not legal, as Von was still technically married to his first wife, Velma, who had disappeared. It wasn't until Velma resurfaced around 1965 that Von could obtain a proper divorce, allowing him and Mary Ellen to legally remarry.

                                           Great Aunt Perky, Paul, and Grandma Roe

Despite these legal complications, Mary Ellen and Von built a life together in Modesto, California. Nearly ten years after their initial marriage, they welcomed twin daughters, Mary Jane and Marilyn, both with striking red hair. Their family was completed with the birth of their third daughter, Dawna, about four years later. The family home in Modesto would later become the childhood home for myself and my brother (her grandchildren), creating a multi-generational legacy. Sadly, it was left behind when the area became run down and infiltrated by gangs at which point the family all moved to Idaho, but I have so many wonderful memories of that home.

Mary did what was needed for her family, though she did not enjoy cooking the way my mother does. Her real passions in life were flower gardens and antiques. At one time she even restored antiques. 

Mary Ellen was blessed with eight grandchildren, though tragically, two passed away as infants. The remaining six would eventually establish their own families across California, Washington, and Idaho. After Von's passing, she found love again with Paul Garcia, whom she married on June 18, 1983, in Oakdale, California.

Mary Ellen Hayes Garcia passed away on June 5, 1993, in Oakdale, just days before her eldest grandchild's high school graduation. She was 61 years old. Though she had remarried, she was still lovingly known as "Grandma Roe" to her family until the end. Her journey from the oil fields of Depression-era Oklahoma to the Golden State of California reflects the remarkable adaptability and resilience that characterized her generation.

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